I'm really not that busy

Finding hilarity in the mundane since 2008

Oh no you d’nt!

So, I was at the grocery store the other day.  It was the middle of holiday shopping and the place was packed.  With morons.

Packed. With. Morons.

Here are some of the nitwits I encountered.

Mom being driven nuts by her out-of-school kids: Hey, I know how to kill some time!  Let’s go to the grocery store two days before Christmas and walk four across in the aisles.  If you’re good, I’ll let you race shopping carts in the parking lot!

Rednecks: “Look ma!  Beans in a bag, a can, frozen, and fresh.  What will they think of next, corn in a can?

Dumb boyfriend: “I know it’s a purse from Wal-Mart, but she won’t know the difference.”

Couple without kids: “Let’s get my nephew the electric keyboard and your niece the jumbo pack of punch balls.”

Dude who sees a long lost friend and decides to have a loud, inappropriate conversation while in line in front of me and then doesn’t move the hell out of the way so I can put my groceries on the conveyor: “Bitch.”

Yes, dude called me a bitch when I suggested he and his friend move it to a coffee shop.

Okay, so I might have said boyfriend and hotel room, but I said it very sweetly.


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