I'm really not that busy

Finding hilarity in the mundane since 2008

So I am never using that pediatrician again

I have to keep this short because I AM NOT STAYING UP LATE TONIGHT.  

Truck is in New Jersey this week.  He called me last night to inform me that one of his co-worker’s homes was damaged in a tornado and said tornado was headed toward me.  I watched the news and we seemed to be getting storms and winds, but all our local weathermen said the rain was keeping the tornado activity at bay.
I was still all freaked out.  I stayed up until I couldn’t hold my eyes open any longer and then I woke up every half hour because the wind was so loud.
However, despite my sleep deprivation, I still have a small rant in me.
Huck is taking antibiotics for his strep throat.  He wanted to try the chewable kind this time rather than liquid.  Huge mistake.  Apparently they are completely disgusting.
I went to Target today to see if I could turn in the chewables and get a refill in liquid form.  I fully intended to pay for them, or rather allow my insurance to pay for most of them and I would chip in $10.
This could be a very detailed story.  I was in Target twice today, so you know some funny shit happened.  I am too tired for that so I will cut to the chase: the pediatrician (again NOT my regular pediatrician) did not want to call in a new prescription.
WTF did she think I was going to do with two antibiotic prescriptions?  This isn’t percocet here people, its a child’s dose of amoxicillin or something (I’m not getting up to look at the bottle at this point).  Plus I was willing to surrender the original pills to the pharmacist.
Her suggestion was that I crush up the chewables and put them in pudding.  Clearly she does not have children.  Or possibly she thinks I deserve punishment for allowing my child to play video games in her presence.
Here is how the crushing of the chewables went down.
I had to think really hard about the best way to crush the pills to ensure maximum crushiness with minimum medicinal loss.  I settled on a ziplock bag and meat tenderizer mallet (flat side, not pointy or that would puncture the bag).  It worked fine except I couldn’t get all of the powdered medicine out of the bag.  Isn’t the idea behind antibiotics that you have to take to whole prescription?  Crushing chewables pretty much guarantees loss at every dose.
Then I have to stir the powder into the pudding.  Note to self, do not use original pudding cup for this.  The pudding cup is too small and more medicine is lost.
Then Worm sees the pudding so I have to get him some too.  Great, now both my children will be eating pudding twice a day.  Healthy.
Now comes the fun part.  I have to stand over Huck like the pudding police to ensure all the pudding goes in his mouth.  One big glob hit the floor so that is more medicine that didn’t make it into his body.  I literally made him lick the bowl to make sure he got as much as possible.  He complained the whole time that it tasted funny.  This is a step up from the crying, gagging and general drama that came with eating them plain, but it was still annoying to have him comment about every bite.
Then I realized I have to do this twice. a. day. every. day. until. next. Wednesday.  
I am calling back tomorrow and telling them that crushing chewables is a terrible suggestion and they can either call me in some liquid or come to my house twice a day to deal with the administration of the antibiotics.  
I’m fine with either.

One response to “So I am never using that pediatrician again

  1. jo February 13, 2009 at 11:23 am

    Where is your regular ped? I would keep calling back and insisting. That’s ridiculus! Beotch…give the kid some liquid crap, it’s not a lot to ask.

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